Reciprocating Me!

What do I find invigorating in relationships? Someone like me is truly ideal! This ambiguous clarity was derived from many personal case studies that created disdain or at the very minimal, rupturing sound friendships; which at one time were perceived as assets. Not withstanding my personal experiences, I have also been privileged with the opportunity to observe other relationships; some endured the trials and tribulations while others dissipated into obscurity. I made a promise to myself that I would not be a statistic; I would not be so ambitions to claim someone as my “helpmate” who would in turn assist me to “help hate” myself for my lack of patience. How does one prevent such from occurring…by waiting and defining who I am, which will assist me in discovering who I desire. I can not depend on physical attraction or emotional connection alone; there must be balance. I look at clichés, which loom large in the religious sectors, such as “Equally Yoked” or “Wait on God” to possess substance; while lacking clarity. How about the pagan expression, “You complete me”!

Like many, I have applied these principles to my daily life as it was engrained into my psyche that I need someone to be the yin to my yang and likewise. Been there and done that… without success. Interesting enough I continue that pursuit even though it brought about the same results. It doesn’t matter how many time you have been told you can’t repeat the same action expecting different results, we continue. I guess it is human nature. Fortunately, I am not going to make excuses for myself. It was pure stupidity and I have arrived to the understanding that a healthy relationship is only that if the two parties are healthy individually; which means they must complete themselves allowing an environment of allowing, accepting, and embracing others; that is unconditional love! I realized I must love and be in love with me before I can share that experience with another. I will only receive that which I give!

Early, I mentioned two religious clichés that are engraved in our minds and spirits as youngsters. What does it mean to be equally yoked? Is it when two share the same belief, similar likes and dislikes, the same height and weigh, identify with the same cultural experiences or socio-economic background? I used to think so and I journeyed to find someone who fulfilled those criteria’s. However, I met challenges along the way. It was not until I expanded my mind that I was allowed to grasp the true essence of the statement. I am a philanthropist at heart so it may not be wise for me to engage with someone who is not as concerned with the welfare of others. Does weight or height really matter? It is more important that I find someone physically appealing, even if no one else does. As a matter of fact, it is better if no one else does! Besides, we all mature and will eventfully expire, not to mention if the internal appearance of the woman is not appealing it only debilitates her external assets and if she is amazing internally those assets have a way of resolving the perceived external flaws. Now, I will not discriminate on the ethnicity of a woman or what her social economic background is as long as she is cultured.

When I reference being cultured I am speaking about moving beyond social and ethnic expectations. Why is it that I have to date a woman from another race if I want to experience the opera, ballroom dancing, tango, elegant dining, or travel the world? I am a very diverse thinker and I often wonder why I can not participate in certain activities because of my religious belief or the color of my skin. Our ancestors fought to eradicate this mentality from those outside of our ethnic community so why will I allow myself to be enslaved to such. Communication is essential and I am not referring to only verbal. Non verbal communication is a necessity; as I need someone who provides entrancing eye contact, an embracing smile, a quiet confident walk, and a soft and nurturing touch.

Many women suggest the art of chivalry has expired. Well ladies, we feel like the art of nurturing has become a distant memory. The reassuring of a woman can lead a man to feel like he can accomplish anything. This reminds me of the quote, “Behind a great man is a great woman”. So ladies if you want a great man then you have to first be a great woman! Something that must cease is the drama and the denigration of the other. There is no need to compete between sexes. It doesn’t matter if a woman makes more money that I. As a matter of fact, I welcome that challenge. I desire a woman who can be her best and highest without flaunting it or trying to infringe upon my role as the man. A woman who is sexy without revealing too much skin allows me to use my imagination; however, she must have a chic but conservative style. My ideal woman is one who knows her way around the board room and the bedroom, possessing a sense of innocence. One who embraces the joy and privilege of the opportunity of being submissive with one whom she can trust is greatly exciting to me. Yes, I want a freak in the bed but I don’t need to feel like she is an around the way girl.

Spirituality is very important to me and encompasses much more that religion. Someone who is engaged in an empowering relationship with a higher power, inspiring personal growth and self awareness is greatly appealing to me. As well as the woman who can become one with “Mother Nature” making her impact, compelling greatness from all who encounters her, as well as inspiring me to take hold of my genius. She must be able to cook different types of foods as well as appreciate a clean and peaceful house. There is nothing sexier than me and my lady preparing our meals together and restoring cleanliness to the kitchen. I wash and she dries or she can rinse while I place in dishwasher. If you haven’t noticed yet I am a romantic and enjoy cupid remaining in close proximity. This is who I am and who I desire to enjoy the fullness of life with.